Jannah's

I’m pretty much upset today :( Okay not only today. I AM UPSET THIS WHOLE WEEK. So many things happened. I did some things and in the end its like gone. POOF! Its just gone and it’ll never come back. My effort had gone to TONS OF WASTE. Sometimes i thought of the reasons of why was I even told to do the work. Its like you ask me to do something and in the end, you dont really need me anymore. So why did you even bother asking me to do something when you know that there’s SOMEONE whose WAY BETTER than me. Seriously whats the point? So you want me to learn. But by making someone, whose new to this shit, take over my part is CRAP. Yeah sure I may not be as good as that person but you know and I know that I can be better. I AM CAPABLE OF DOING BETTER. I shouldn’t have agreed in first place. Why can’t I just be the normal girl who just does her duties as a student councilor. I am better off that way. Just let that person take over all of my parts, everything. Its just stupid that I only came out just to do one part and the others have way more parts to do unlike me. Exactly, whats the point of asking me doing it when its only one part? Just go ask the others to do it! I’m sure they would be glad to have more air time on stage. Then on the other side, I did an artwork and in the end, due to some MISUNDERSTANDINGS, it won’t be given away. Like ugh, you had to tell me that the day AFTER I handed it in. WHO WOULDN’T BE UPSET?! WTF. FML. I just hate this week. It has been giving me endless problems. I can never settle them for once. Its so stupid. Thats it. IM NOT GONNA TAKE UP ANYMORE FORMAL EVENT EMCEE JOB. Just go find that person whose SO GOOD and leave me alone. I even quit that EXCO job cos I know its not worth it and I know Drama will support me no matter what.  I just can’t take it anymore. I am sick and tired of all this crap. UGH, she’s really getting on my nerves ever since the start she came in for that emcee job. I am done rowing the boat with her so i just get out of the boat to save myself.

P.S: IM UNSURE OF THIS CERTAIN FRIEND OF MINE. Hmmmm

I think I went really red when venessa said,”see? Told you he likes you!”. :x friend was there with vijay. They just so happen to be there whenever I’m around. I turned red when she said that but Rachel and I denied. I hope he doesn’t think I like him. I just like him as a friend. He’s like a brother to me. After school, I was doing math with Atikah then he came with hanhui. Then he just left to the canteen, leaving their bag on the table as mine. While doing math, I was alone with the guys. Atikah went away for awhile. It was funny. Suddenly he asked me if I’m going for PTM and I said no and he was all,”okay good,” and I’m like okay. Weird. He was like asking me things and making sure that everything I said was fine to him. He looked sort of angry when I sounded annoyed cos everytime I’m somewhere, they would be there. But I did apologize. Hehe. I’m a nice person.

I’m such a happy person today :D I love the GSS student council. They are the most awesomest people I’ve ever met. The fact that one guy who has been my friend since sec 1 was willing to teach POA was like a blessing. I guess he’s the reason why I am so happy today. He totally made my day. I love him for being my friend though we were not that close. I also have other friends who made happy today too. Their presence made me feel so lighten up. I had been so happy today. Without my friends I don’t think I can be this happy like today. XOXO to the lovely people!

Today was not bad. I observed a few things about him and I think I made my assumption wrongly. Justin tried to ask me to go with him for the china thing but I said no to him. I had admit that I was a little bored sitting alone with the two guys. Being a kind person I asked Zheng yang to carry their bags for them. I felt that lessons dread alot. During art, I saw the guys and exco. Well I talked to Nicholas. I reminded him to eat his lunch since he didn’t ate his recess earlier. See I’m a kind soul! I take care of him like how I take care of my other friends. But it seemed like I cared for a guy so much. He’s just a friend nothing more I can assure that. I was really happy whenever I see him. Seeing him makes me cheery. When he called out my name from downstairs, I was being from sad to mad happy. I ensured that he ate lunch too. I feel like a mother to him! -.- anyways, he did. I’m glad he did if not I’d be asking to get lunch rather than going for band :P I’m totally taking care of him. I didn’t went for drama today :/ by the time I reached, they were dismissed. I felt guilty. Kay bye. :D

Observations:
Nothing much happened in the early morning. Usual waving to each other. Wonder why he suddenly changed after the bintan trip. I guess he just wave to me so that I won’t get mad at him when actually I don’t. Last lesson he came. Waved hi to me but he came all the way thru the huge messy crowded area in class just to say hi to me. Aww so sweet LOL! Ate pizza, fed seniors haha. He came and I offered him and I realized that I’m up to his shoulder grrrr I’m short :/ fed him too then yeah. It became a goodbye session. Done. Such a long observation LMAO

I survived. I survived from the 15th! I’m strong, definitely strong. I think maturely of relationships( I think :x) and I have jumped over the biggest hurdle ever! I saw Dzul before PE lesson. His voice is so distinctive. It was so easy to recognize his voice. D: ah run some more run some more J: eh! Wait you’re having PE now? D: yeah why? J: so I’m having PE with your class then D: yeah. How come you haven’t change yet? J: I just came back from Art! That’s why.. D: ish.. That’s all. It didn’t had that kinda awkward feel that I thought it would have. Then during Malay, i asked Tricia about the NAFA open house. She said it was fine then she mention that he was there. -.-” then I told her about the PE lesson thing. She was like oohing and aahing. she talked about how he would always talked about girls on facebook. That’s really stupid. I have a feeling his next target would be Sabrina. Oh bad. But SinYu said Sabrina wouldn’t have a Malay boyfriend. So I hope that’s true. That guy really has got to keep his thoughts to himself. Today was fine I supposed. I went to school with Amelia then sat with Nicholas, Justin and Sanggari. Nicholas sort of taught me how to do POA. LOL. I told him about how he thought I was angry at him cos I didn’t said hi to him at all at Bintan. Pity him. He couldn’t remember it at all or maybe he just pretends to forget. Hmmm.. Anyways, I’ve been spending my weeks sitting with him and Justin during assembly. It was fun. I love them for making me super happy at the start of the day.

2nd week of school. Who knew it would turn out that way? I’m sitting around new people. Mostly new. It’s just the same people I saw in school but this time they’re with me for the next 2 years. Class was quite okay. Guys with long pants. LOL. Some looked okay but the rest, still gotta get used to them wearing it. Some guys in my class has a bad case of pimples. An example would be Lawrence. Like IKR! He has tons on his nose. I hope he removes them like ASAP! But he turned out the way I thought he would be. He’s pretty quiet and hardworking. He does jokes around, cracks some lame jokes(or does he just follow the flow of the joke that was said?) and always questioning people. The other time he asked me why I had to meet mr Chong. Curious boy. He’s real tall, about 169? I’m still 155 -.- And I gained weight like ugh. Anyways, I’ve been getting heaps of homework. And I’m still okay with it. But the thing I’m not okay with is my lack of sleep. Which just reminds me. I NEED TO SLEEP NOW. Kay bye.

OMG, it’s been long since I’ve updated? Yes. Anyways, I’ve been like rotting at home, not doing anything useful. I felt as if I lost my touch for studies. Boohoo. There goes my plan for AWESOMESS grades. It’s okay, I will start over again, just like the last time.

Semestar 2 was like a quick rush.

Had 45th Anniversary on the first week so I had been seeing Dhak like consistently. :DD It was like so much fun! I totally love my costume. Teachers are treating us lunch next week. THRIPLE CHEERS!

Second week, back to Rainbow Centre.

Third week which is this week, I got my new duty. It is ANNOUNCEMENTS duty. I’ve already made a fool out of myself twice. I said BASKETBALL BALLERS instead of BASKETBALLERS! Ugh, FML. I made out of myself.

Drama was fun today. :D Had usual warm ups then we read some scripts and we discussed about our teacher’s farewell party. :( I’m gonna miss all the times we had, especially during the Perth Trip.

OH YEAH, Perth Trip was like the AWESOMESS! Except that at one point we had tons of misunderstandings but wth, like WE give a damn about it. The 6 of us, Fana, Jeremy, Esaias, Amelia, Venessa and I hung out together most of the time. Super duper retarded! We were like crazy. ROFL. Like IKR! It’s our inside joke. :P I still remember that I hit this guy’s shoulder there! So it was like this. The 6 of us were waiting to go in to watch a show at John Curtin College. So we were talking suddenly Venessa tickled me then Esaias did then I hit this cute guy’s shoulder! His shoulder was like HARD! But according to Fana, he giggled and smiled. Aww, I wanna see him! Hehe..

Andandand, I’m officially 14!! I’ve got headphones from parents, a keychain from Esaias, a headband from Naqiyah and a card from Dzul. Lovely. Well, I celebrated my birthday with last minute homework and then celebrated it over at grandparents’ place with aunt and Naqiyah’s family. :DDD I love the fruity cake.

Well, me and Dzul are officially like 2 people who just know alot about each other but treat as if it’s like nothing. Haish, he’s like dealing with his relationship issues. Having too many ex-es is a bad thing too. The next thing you know, all the partners you dated are all somehow related to each other. Haha, like me and Rose. I’ve been friends with her since last year and we had the same ex, which was him. Haha, I find him foolish. Why bother having so many partners when you can have many friends? In that way, there will no issues on relationships. Cheyy, I talk big like what seyy! :P

Me and Dhak? Haha, seems like it’s impossible for me and him to have one simple conversation. Hahah. I’ll end here. Woo!~

I just can’t seem to erase my fear. Why? Why? Why? It’s creeping me out and haunting me. What can I do? I guess I’m stuck here. :P

We live in fear everyday but someday it’ll just go away and we wont be fearful of it anymore

Okay, I don’t know if I should be in love or not cos at one point, I’m not really think about him but when I saw him then I would start daydreaming. Well I saw Dhak today when I was on the way to the black box. My heart started beating so quickly but then I remembered that it’s just puppy love and I didnt want to end up like ________. So yeah, I’ll stop here. Bleh. Good night lovely people.